Това е втората книга, издадена тази година, която подбирам сякаш заради тежката тематика. Въпреки това в нея има толкова много живот и откровеност - много повече от други истории.
Паул Каланити завършва своята специализация като неврохирург на 36 години и получава фатална диагноза - рак на белите дробове, четвърти стадий. Книгата е написана в последните му месеци и остава много след него. Тя беше начело на множество класации за най-добри книги за 2016та, откъдето научих за нея. Преди това авторът е писал няколко есета, които могат да бъдат намерени тук:
http://paulkalanithi.com/tag/essays/
Предисловът, писан от Abraham Verghese, е впечатляващо начало на книгата. За пръв път се възхищавам, а не искам бързо да прескоча страниците. Беше много емоционален и искрен, ето откъс от него.
"Be ready. Be seated. See what courage sounds like. See how brave it is to reveal yourself in this way. But above all, see what it is to still live, to profoundly influence the lives of others after you are gone, by your words. In a world of asynchronous communication, where we are so often buried in our screens, our gaze rooted to the rectangular objects buzzing in our hands, our attention consumed by ephemera, stop and experience this dialogue with my young departed colleague, now ageless and extant in memory. Listen to Paul. In the silences between his words, listen to what you have to say back. Therein lies his message. I got it. I hope you experience it, too. It is a gift."
За пръв път имам чувството, че съм опознала напълно непознат човек само и единствено с една негова творба. Благодарна съм, че попаднах на тази книга, за да имам възможността да опозная Пол Каланити.
Човещината в тази книга е впечатляваща и вдъхновяваща. Той се опитва наистина да разбере своите пациенти - не просто като случаи, а като хора.
Пол не успява да допише книгата, състоянието му се влошава значително през последните седмици. Предсмъртното му желание е тя да е публикувана, издателството и жена му Люси го изпълняват. Люси пише епилог, който довършва неговата история и показва колко невероятен живот, както и брак, са имали двамата заедно.
Целта на тази книга е изпълнена определено, Пол Каланити би бил доволен от това. Читателят опознава трудностите и неизбежността на смърта по един много човешки начин, чрез последните месеци от живота на писателя. Прелестно четиво!
"Books became my closest confidants, finely ground lenses providing new views of the world."
"Though we had free will, we were also biological organisms—the brain was an organ, subject to all the laws of physics, too! Literature provided a rich account of human meaning; the brain, then, was the machinery that somehow enabled it. It seemed like magic."
"Cadavers reverse the polarity. The mannequins you pretend are real; the cadavers you pretend are fake. But that first day, you just can’t. When I faced my cadaver, slightly blue and bloated, his total deadness and total humanness were undeniable."
“I don’t believe in the wisdom of children, nor in the wisdom of the old. There is a moment, a cusp, when the sum of gathered experience is worn down by the details of the living. We are never so wise as when we live in the moment.”
“That message is simple: When you come to one of the many moments in life when you must give an account of yourself, provide a ledger of what you have been, and done, and meant to the world, do not, I pray, discount that you filled a dying man’s days with a sated joy, a joy unknown to me in all my prior years, a joy that does not hunger for more and more, but rests, satisfied. In this time, right now, that is an enormous thing.”
"Paul’s decision to look death in the eye was a testament not just to who he was in the final hours of his life but who he had always been. For much of his life, Paul wondered about death—and whether he could face it with integrity. In the end, the answer was yes.
I was his wife and a witness."
"Books became my closest confidants, finely ground lenses providing new views of the world."
"Though we had free will, we were also biological organisms—the brain was an organ, subject to all the laws of physics, too! Literature provided a rich account of human meaning; the brain, then, was the machinery that somehow enabled it. It seemed like magic."
"Cadavers reverse the polarity. The mannequins you pretend are real; the cadavers you pretend are fake. But that first day, you just can’t. When I faced my cadaver, slightly blue and bloated, his total deadness and total humanness were undeniable."
“I don’t believe in the wisdom of children, nor in the wisdom of the old. There is a moment, a cusp, when the sum of gathered experience is worn down by the details of the living. We are never so wise as when we live in the moment.”
“That message is simple: When you come to one of the many moments in life when you must give an account of yourself, provide a ledger of what you have been, and done, and meant to the world, do not, I pray, discount that you filled a dying man’s days with a sated joy, a joy unknown to me in all my prior years, a joy that does not hunger for more and more, but rests, satisfied. In this time, right now, that is an enormous thing.”
"Paul’s decision to look death in the eye was a testament not just to who he was in the final hours of his life but who he had always been. For much of his life, Paul wondered about death—and whether he could face it with integrity. In the end, the answer was yes.
I was his wife and a witness."

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